5 Cliches Every Single Girl is Tired of Hearing

Chances are if like me, you’ve been single for…well, FOREVER; you most likely receive a regular dosage of advice on how to take on life, as a single-gal. Now there’s nothing wrong with such advice and I myself often read blog posts about embracing singleness and so on and so fort. Now the thing is, most of the time, these “Single-Gal Manuals” are often repetitive, mostly cliché and always fail to adapt the perspective of life as an actual single person.

There are a plethora of reasons why Single-Dom is the place to be. However I really don’t expect a person, deep into a three-year relationship to be well versed on these reasons. Yet these people who are often our well-meaning friends, always seem to be well equipped with seemingly good advice on singleness and its many Joys.

Now advice is advice, even well meant, poorly thought out, and over-used advice from less than qualified people (excuse the shade). But here’s to hoping the next time someone offers advice to a single person they take into account that we are tired of hearing these over abused sayings.

1.   

  “TRUST ME IT’LL COME WHEN YOU’RE NOT EVEN LOOKING”

Honestly, this doesn’t even make sense. If two people find themselves in a relationship, at least one person had to be looking right? Even if it’s just a little bit. The idea of two people with no intentions towards each other, being together really sounds like beginning of a long- term situation-ship, in which both parties have zero idea what they’re LOOKING for.To put it quite simply if you want to be in a relationship, there is no point in purposefully not looking for one, and absolutely nothing wrong in looking for one. What are dating apps made for right??

2.

     “GIRL ITS ALL ABOUT TIMING, YOUR TIME WILL COME”

This saying suggests that the transition from being single to a being in a relationship has something to do with fate. Does that mean that right now I’m fated to be single but perhaps in 6-12 months then It’ll be my time to be in a relationship? Therefore, I really should just be content waiting indefinitely for a supposed time that I have no idea off? REALLY? There is no such thing, as “my time will come” if you want to be in a relationship then like most things in life you have to be active about it, sitting around waiting for fate to throw your man at you really 
won’t get you anywhere.

3.

     MAYBE YOU’RE TO PICKY. GET RID OF THAT LIST”

NOO!! Keep that list.

There is nothing, I repeat absolutely nothing wrong with having a well thought out and realistic list. Lists allow us to have a clear idea of what we’re looking for in someone else and also allow us to identify when we’ve found it. If your list contains things like: billionaire, house in Malibu, Rolls Royce; then I’m afraid your girlfriends are probably right in advising you to get rid of that list. Truth is there is a difference between wanting to be in a relationship and desperate to be in a relationship, if you fall into the latter then maybe this advice may work for you. Otherwise from one single-gal to the other NEVER DROP YOUR STANDARDS.

     4.

      YOU DON’T KNOW HOW LUCKY YOU ARE TO BE SINGLE”.

I find it ironic that, “how lucky we are” is constantly reiterated by our coupled-up, lets not forget, well-meaning girlfriends. Yet we don’t see any of them rushing out of a healthy relationship to take a fun ride on the single train.  Does this imply that maybe; just maybe the grass isn’t greener on our side? Being single does have its perks, and so does being in a relationship. To put it nicely being told how lucky I am from someone in a relationship, really does nothing to soothe the want for a relationship. Though it’s coming from a good place, it is fairly obvious that single people are only told this in a bid to help them feel better about themselves. And lets face it being single really has nothing to do with luck.

5.     

“PUT YOURSELF OUT THERE MORE!

Could someone please point me to the direction of “Out There More”. Do I go straight ahead, make a right, then turn left at the junction, and its right in front of me? Ironically this saying usually stems from people who found their significant other in the most familiar places i.e. university, work, down the road. Yet they tell us to travel 25 miles and back to find our man. Being single isn’t a plague, there is little need to go though unneccessary lengths, in order to fulfil the “Out There More” aspect, of finding a relationship. Wherever or whatever “Out  There More” is , I am fairly certain it doesn’t hold the key to a long lasting relationship.

I must also add that whilst writing this, I was extremely cautious of not sounding like the bitter single girl. Which just goes to show, that it is nearly impossible to express authentic feelings about being single, without being deemed a “salty sally” pun intended. When we do brave discussing our concerns we are greeted with these 5 clichés and many more. On the flip side I do sympathise with our girlfriends, they are charged with the huge responsibility of carefully counselling us through the rot without causing too much offence. Honestly if the roles were reversed, I genuinely wouldn’t know what to say either. So it really isn’t their fault, instead lets blame society for… well society is to blame for everything right? One thing I know is that these clichés aren’t going away any time soon. So I guess that we’ll just have to “patiently wait for our time to come”, whilst “not looking”, and “putting ourselves out-there more”, at the same time lets “get rid of our lists” and be sure to remind ourselves of how “lucky we are to be single”

 Till Next Time...

Love

TEE.x